Update: Jeremy Blake's body identified. RIP.

I am obsessed with this case of apparent double-suicide. Journalists are suggesting that harassment by the Church of Scientology and other seemingly paranoid thoughts as detailed in Theresa Duncan's blog post from May feuled this tragedy. I can't stop scouring the internet for updates because there are so so many unanswered questions and it's plain creepy.

Did she really kill herself? Her blog doesn't seem like the blog of someone who would kill herself - obviously one can beguile their readers but still...she didn't seem in the depths of despair. If so, then why? There must have been a trigger. Did she have a history of depression? Pills and booze found next to her body plus the conspiracy stuff...conjures up a little Marilyn...A long suicide note? What does it say?

As a romantic it fits in my world view that Jeremy Blake was unable to fathom living without her so he took his own life. I can get that. Or...he faked his death for an art piece about death and fame. It's his final act in resignation from the art world. He killed her. He broke up with her and his guilt overwhelmed him. The body that washed up onshore that they're suspecting is his probably is...otherwise, is he sipping on a pina colada on a remote beach?

Who knows but why aren't more people talking about this online? It is because the art world is snooty and insular and private? Or is this all a hoax?

The mystery will be revealed in the fall!

After a year and a half it is finally up! If you have 13 minutes to kill check it out!

I dream of having a baby that looks just like this. Futile dreaming, sure, but fun nonetheless.

* Zee's mom's friend's baby Mai!

How do you guys feel about the dog rental thing? It's taken me for a roller coaster ride! My initial thought was that the service sounded like a fantastic idea and created especially for me! A second later it felt wrong and sad and bad. Who are these pups and where did they come from? Where do they live most of the time? I suppose sporadic human attention is better than none but what about the whole concept of attachment to an owner/companion? Oh this is just too much reality for me today!

* Hotel de Ville station.

* Thanks to Bram for the introduction of a lifetime!

Once in a blue moon a video so great inspires a haiku!

Puppy's exhausted expression.
Duckling forces kiss and cuddle.
TGIcuteFriday!

One more whistle and I would have died:

Continuing the trend of interspecies friends I submit to you the world's cutest couple:

* Thanks to my Uncle Derek for the photo!!

I think this is an oldie. Certainly a goodie.

Another in the very exciting subway series of guess who?!...

* At the yummy Chevy's in Battery Park City.

One of New York City's many weird and cute offerings:

* Thanks to Lily for the photo!

* Spotted outside of the Bodies exhibit.

The Bodies exhibition was awesome and holding up the bridge was tiring!

Update: Caroline Knapp died in 2002 of lung cancer. She was a heavy smoker. Very, very sad.

I had my eye on this book for years so it was perfect timing that it is recommended reading for one of my fall classes. I read it straight through in a few sittings which meant it was a bit overwhelming and redundant at times but as a whole it is a well-written and profoundly insightful memoir about drinking and alcoholism. What most resonated with me is the idea that there are phases of alcoholism from having alcoholic tendencies to full-blown homeless alcoholic. If this is true there are many, many more people with alcohol problems than meets the eye. I believe this and the idea that there are not a lot of people who truly have a healthy relationship with alcohol. I definitely have a love-hate-horrific-ecstatic relationship with alcohol which is far from healthy! The painful experiences and hard lessons Knapp details holds true for all addictive behaviors so if you're interested in addiction, I highly recommend this book.

Two passages I particularly liked:

One of the first things you hear in AA - one of the first things that makes core, gut-level sense - is that in some deep and important personal respects you stop growing when you start drinking alcoholically. The drink stunts you, prevents you from walking through the kinds of fearful life experiences that bring you from point A to point B on the maturity scale. When you drink in order to transform yourself, when you drink and become someone you're not, when you do this over and over and over, your relationship to the world becomes muddied and unclear. You lose your bearings, the ground underneath you begins to feel shaky. After a while you don't know even the most basic things about yourself - what you're afraid of, what feels good and bad, what you need in order to feel comforted and calm-because you've never given yourself a chance, a clear, sober chance to find out. p. 75

Essentially, drinking artificially "activates" the brain's reward system: you have a martini or two and the alcohol acts upon the brain's circuitry that makes you feel good, increasing the release of the neurotransmitter dopamine, which is central to feelings of pleasure and reward. Over time (and given the right combination of vulnerability to alcohol and alcohol abuse), the brain develops what are known as "compensatory adaptations" to all that artificial revving up: in an effort to bring its own chemistry back into its natural equilibrium, it works overtime to decrease dopamine release, ultimately leaving those same pleasure/reward circuits depleted. p. 126

* At the beach behind The Raleigh, The Standard Miami's sister hotel.

* At The Standard Miami.

* At The Standard Miami.

* At The Standard Miami.

I love and appreciate the concept of this watch - life is short! be nice to your loved ones! live to the fullest! The face is beautiful but too bad the stainless steel case is so bulky and where the band connects to the case so airy, otherwise I would have bought one. Take note: Only a handful of the 100 limited pieces are left so act quickly!

* Thanks to cousin Angelina for posting this first!

* Collins & 7th, South Beach.

In MyHammy for my birthday - off to the beach! Enjoy celebrating my birthday today! :-)

xoxox
AH.com

* Read about the Bofinger and its interesting past and present via Frommers and The Observer!

* Along the Seine near the Tour Eiffel.

I had the awesomest dream last night. I was riding my grandmother's horse Foxy (who after a lifetime of being ridden a lot then not so much is almost feral) bareback which I've never attempted before. What amazed me was that even without reins and a saddle I was able to navigate Foxy and we had a great system down pat. At the end of the fantastic day I jumped off her and while trying to hold back tears of joy I signing her: I (I pointed to myself) love (I crossed my arms as if hugging myself) you (I pointed to her). Foxy then picked up her front legs and signed the same message back to me. We beamed and embraced and I was the happiest girl on the planet.

I'm not scared, I'm not scared, I'm not scared.

* On the Champs Elysees.

* At the Palais Royal.

* Window shopping in the Marais.

* On the Rue des Archives in the Marais

Someone got cute new shoes!

This really makes me want to buy 10 of them and while Jonah's sleeping, place them on each unsuspecting finger...that's what's so fun about marriage - playing tricks!!

My search for a good psychology magazine to subscribe to was surprisingly difficult. I quickly realized there is a dearth of mainstream psych mags. Of the slim pickings Psychology Today was hugely disappointing and highly irritating. Thank goodness I then discovered Scientific American Mind which I love and highly recommend!

I walked out of Sicko with an overwhelming pride for sharing a nationality with Michael Moore as he may be one of the greatest American patriots of our time. It is obvious from all his films that he is not a journalist. If you hold him to journalistic standards it is incredibly frustrating to watch his films which are about relentlessly complex problems yet that doesn't stop him from over simplifying, over romanticizing and failing to blame all culpable parties. He is however, a true patriot in the sense that he holds America to the ideals she so strongly espouses and by using the tactics he knows best and is best known for, tirelessly tries to make her live up to all of them. Even with the overstatements and oversights replete in this film, I ask you how many people are making films spotlighting our atrocious health care system and its painful consequences? Not many so I commend you, Michael Moore!

I adored this book as if it were that old, soft blanket that lives on the corner of your couch, just waiting to do its job of warming you up as you snuggle up to your book and cup of tea. I rarely read fiction but I never miss an installment of Smith's 44 Scotland Street series nor the Isabel Dalhousie mysteries. If you're an AMS fan and haven't read 44 Scotland Street, I highly recommend you start on that and look forward to its worthy successor Espresso Tales!

Don't let this be you cuz if so, today will suck big-time!

* For more of the Huitrerie Regis dinner click here!

* At the highly recommended Huitrerie Regis restaurant!

* Great discovery made during dinner with the Wilkies.

We had a nice dinner with Mark and Tam and Josie last week - thanks for bringing giggling Josie and beautiful flowers!

Read more about this Japanese heartthrob here!

Thanks for the great link, Gemma!!

* In the Marais.

It's great when people truly in need of antidepressants take them but I have a sneaking suspicion that many people are simply too emotionally lazy to do the necessary hard work of examining and changing their lives. I also think American society is to blame given that it's f-%^ed in so many ways - Americans eat disgusting, harmful crap for food, It would behoove us as a society to think a little more from the 'we' perspective than the 'I', don't you think?! How about a crazy little thing called universal health care?? Of all doctors psychiatrists take the most money from drug companies? Sweet! - it's not surprising that so many people want to numb themselves.

Dr. Ronald Dworkin tells the story of a woman who didn't like the way her husband was handling the family finances. She wanted to start keeping the books herself but didn't want to insult her husband.

"Doctors are now medicating unhappiness," said Dworkin. "Too many people take drugs when they really need to be making changes in their lives." continue reading...

* In the Marais.

* Eaten to Jonah's delight on our first night.

* L'Ambassade d'Auvergne via TimeOut Paris.

This is disturbing to say the least.

* In the Marais.

Please please please don't merde on me.

A great passage I couldn't agree more with from Alexander McCall Smith's Espresso Tales. Domenica, a woman of 60 chats with Pat, her 20 something friend:

"...I can definitely see how I've looked at things differently after forty. I'm less tolerant of bad behavior, I think, than I used to be. And why do you think that is?"

Pat shrugged. "You get a bit more set in your ways? You become more judgmental?"

"And what is wrong with being judgmental?" Domenica asked indignantly. "It drives me mad to hear people say: 'Don't be judgmental." That's moral philosophy at the level of an Australian soap opera. If people weren't judgmental, how could we possibly have a moral viewpoint in society? We wouldn't have the first clue where we were. All rational discourse about what we should do would grind to a halt. No, whatever you do, don't fall for that weak-minded nonsense about not being judgmental. Don't be excessively judgmental, if you like, but always - always - be prepared to make a judgment. Otherwise you'll go through life not really knowing what you mean."

I miss Japanese TV. Thank god for the few clips left on YouTube!

This show looks so good. Can't wait!

* via BuzzFeed.

Wait! Where did he go?! Oh no! We're going to have to spend the weekend turning the apt upside down looking for him again!!

* Thanks to my bro for the photo!

These are great points for filmmakers and people obsessed with film making like me.

* Thanks Kottke! These are more than O.K.! :-)