So I suppose this spiritual advisOr doesn't care about typos??

Because obviously she foresaw it!

Hey, check out the woman with the dead animal on her head!

Sink your eyeballs into this beauty!

*spotted at Filene's Basement on 6th Ave.

I miss this lovely, musically inclined kitty, Greta.

*Oh! For those who don't know Greta and why I would miss her, don't worry, it's nothing tragic...it's just that she's not my cat so I don't get to smother her with love as often as I'd like, that's all.

It's just so touching to see a Mercedes Benz embrace nature in this way...

*parked on Prince between Lafayette & Mulberry

Here's Todd Barry's submission to this week's Onion column called Say Something Funny...

Well he sure did!!!

Update: The link is now restored, working and playing beautifully.

Watching this video, I can't help but think, "Now, this is a great product of creativity."

Also, it's RIDICULOUSLY CUTE.

Click below to see for yourself!

Beware, you may just end up jamming out like Sally, here!

Finally, what I've been waiting for! Approval to marry Sparky!

Look at how happy the newleyweds are!

You're only a click away, fellow pet freaks whom I love!

People!

Listen Up!

There's a new band in town...

!

And they've recorded a fiesty, catty, bitchy, ditty so listen up!

Click on Sleep With Me.mp3

I was reading in Sunday's NYTimes this nice article about a couple leaving their digital camera in a NYC taxi cab only to have it returned by a kind New Yorker when I was reminded of my own similar tale of good fortune in New York City!

A few hours later I walked by this situation and thought perhaps this purse would also have a happy ending, in its owner's arms, but was just taking a detour, hanging out on a car window?

My story went like this:

It was about four years ago. I was visiting friends in NYC while living in Tokyo. At the end of a long, fun, blurry night I must have dropped my Frada (Fake Prada) purse. The next morning, I was busy kicking my own ass for being such an idiot and feeling just a wee bit under the weather. Naturally I didn't think I would ever see the purse nor its contents ever again. A few minutes later the phone rang at my friend's house and it was my dad calling from Shanghai to ask, "Andrea~have you lost your purse~?" I momentarily thought, "Does daddy know everything I do? Is daddy god?" After mustering up a confused, "yeah~" I discovered that a nice man named Raymond had my purse and wanted to return it to me. It turns out he had picked up the purse on his way home to his apt he shares with his partner. The following morning, his partner woke up alarmed to find a purse in their bedroom so stood over the hungover Raymond while gripping the purse and gingerly asked if there was anything Raymond needed to tell him. There certainly wasn't, except his confusion at why he chose to pick up (what he thought was) a fabulous Prada purse while stumbling home drunk. Nevertheless, after using up all my makeup (J/K!) they began to search for the purse's rightful owner. They found my Merril Lynch Japan - Marketing Associate business card and my California drivers license so using my California address they found the corresponding phone number which landed a conversation with my grandmother, lone rancher atop a mountain near Yosemite. I can only imagine the conversation went something like this:

Raymond: Hi, do you know an Andrea Harner?

Grandma (in a super high-pitched voice-she was runner up for Minnie Mouse's voice-no joke): Why, I certainly do! She's my granddaughter!

Raymond: Well, I have her purse and I'd like to give it back to her.

Grandma: She's in Japan!

Raymond: I think she's in New York...

Grandma: I didn't know she was in New York! Why do you have her purse?

Raymond: It was laying in the gutter in the East Village.

Grandma: Oh dear.

The rest of the story is that my dad gave me Raymon'd info which was given to him by my grandma and then I met Raymond at the bar One & One on First St. & First Ave. where I bought him a bottle of wine and we toasted to friendly New Yorkers!

So it's true people, you can get drunk and drop your purse whereever you'd like and you are certain to get it back...no worries!! Try it sometime!

So I thought it appropriate to post something democrat considering today's Iowa caucus...so here's the pleasant surprise my dentist's office had in store for me when I went in for a check up a few days ago.

Here was the view from my chair-Hillary & Bill checking me out with my mouth wide open:

Here's my cool dentist displaying his Clinton love with a bright white smile a dentist would be proud of!

Go DEAN!!

It's another Mouse Over Creation! Intentionally sloppy to juxtapose this sophisticated, highly advanced web trick so just humor me!

This is the cool little white kitty I stalk when I'm in Chinatown.

I'm so glad that at the last minute we joined John Johnson & Susan Short for the Nantucket Film Festival & Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS Benefit featuring a staged reading by Ben Stiller, Marisa Tomei, Mario Cantone and others of SHOWSTOPPER, a screenplay by Geoffrey Nauffts and Anthony Barrile.

There's John's back and the biggest disco ball ever made:

Here's Ben Stiller ('s back) being interviewed:

Ben Stiller ('s front is much better than back, don't you think?) and the lovely as can be Marisa Tomei did an amazing job acting and reading this great screenplay :

There's half the cast of characters with Mario Cantone all the way on the left, who did an absolutely fabulous Judy Garland rendition:

At the end of the night, we discovered the blizzard and that Times Square looks best in a blizzard:

This is us in the blizzard and our breath:

On the way home, I stopped to admire the cute paw prints and if you look closely you'll notice that a squid also sat in the snow:

And on the way to work this morning, I found a really cold bathtub:

The day after New Year's Eve was a lovely day, primarily because it was my certain special someone's birthday but also because of that few seconds when we believe in all our hopes and dreams for the new year...

Soon enough though, reality sets in and as we ventured out for bloody marys, we noticed remnants of the previous evening.

This bottle of Veuve Cliquot that was most certainly coddled and loved...is now just a battered trash item...don't we love being fickle:

It's nice to be a princess in a tiara isn't it?

When you're hailing that cab at 7 in the morning, mascara staining your cheeks and breath potent enough to kill, you're NOT so much of a princess anymore, are ya darlin'?

Looks like someone one's New Year's resolution was to quit hitting the bong!

Or perhaps to throw out an old, ugly bong for a nicer, even bigger one?? hmmn? hmmn?

It was a freezing cold night so this girl certainly did not take off her pantyhose because it was too hot!!

Or perhaps it was too hot in the backseat of that cab!!

And in the end, dreams of rockstardom are also thrown out when you realize, "I'm a really shitty guitar player-forget this charade!"

It's almost the mid-January point...How are your hopes and dreams for 2004 working out for ya???

Most Grandmas are sugary sweet, rocking on their rocking chairs, looking lovingly at you wishing they had all the time and money in the world to shower you with love and affection?

Well my Grandma is more than that. Much much more than that.

For example, on the recent Harner Vegas Vacation, my Grandma showed just how generous she can be.

Firstly, I received a PFM (perfect for me) present from my brother: the 20th Anniversary Edition Trivial Pursuit (some of you may know that I would get out of bed at 3 in the morning if only to play Trivia).

As I tore open the box to start memorizing answers because cheating is allowed in Trivia...Grandma went into a schpeel about giving us treasures from the 19th century...

and then she handed one of these to each of us ... yup, just what you see lying pristinely on the Trivia set...

NAIL CLIPPERS

Not even TOE nail clippers which might have entered the $1-$2 range but nooooo, little TRIM brand nail clippers you find everywhere.

My brother's reaction was a sing songy, nervous, "o~h~!"

My dad responsed in the best monotone I've heard yet, "Nail clippers...Just want I wanted."

And my mom and I proceeded to cut our nails.

Later, my brother summed up the experience perfectly by suggesting we ask, "Grandma, do you hate us?"

Final Thoughts: Remember, it's the thought that counts HOWEVER DON'T EVER BUY ANYONE NAIL CLIPPERS BECAUSE THAT'S JUST CHEAP. Spring the extra .50 cents for a card and write something sweet in it. Truuuust me, you "would be nail clipper givers" out there!

If there's one thing you do while in LA, make sure to catch the band Metal Shop on Monday nights in the Viper Room for a silly good time!

Here's one other person who wrote about how absolutely worth it it is to see Metal Shop while in LA-so I must be right! ha!

Here they are in the middle of a heart wrenching rendition of Bon Jovi's "Shot Through The Heart!"

Note the audience member with the "spider web on elbow" tattoo-HOT.

Oops! Too much of the wrong heads...

There we go...for the money shot:

This is what happens to your face after Metal Shop but it's totally worth it...

And that's the Viper Room after some peyote sprinkled drinks!-J/K! J/K!

Big shout out to my special friend Nicole-blonde in above photo-for the rockin' good time!

While romping around with family in CA, I realized that art is everywhere!

Even in places I least expected...like my Uncle Robert's house!

A few years back, Uncle Robert declared he wanted to live a simple life and would therefore rip out the existing garden and flowers and replace them with cement...voila, a simple, low-maintenance life.

But alas, he has grown a green thumb and...even displays art work!!

I couldn't say it any better than this hilarious video...click now!

I'm finally responding to the overwhelming RFWs (Request for Wishlist) that I received before the holidays from all you friendly people out there...well aaaaall right, I'll give in...here it is!

Monopoly with cute ass dogs all over it.

I can see it already!...fitting beautifully in our little game center, flanked between two editions of Trivia and my pepto pink patent leather backgammon set.

This pretty much sums up the Harner Vegas Vacation...all that we saw and did while we spent the 24th & 25th of December, in Vegas...baby...

Yup, Clint Holmes...

Nothin' but Clint Holmes and hookers, Clint Holmes and hookers...

Just Kidding!! Laughing Out Loud!

I am so happy to be back in the city I adore...

and delighted to see that the crosswalk guy has finally been clothed!

I believe he's wearing JAMS...remember from the 80s???

AWESOME.

Check out this great site exposing NRA Leaders and the things they have said and continue to say!

Get your laugh on as you incredulously sift through one horrific comment after the other and then be rendered speechless when you realize that this is not a joke.

Keep the pressure on...these wackos have got to go!

After quite a nice trip visiting family in CA and a hectic but fun move into our new awesome apt, I am back in blog action.

A major highlight from my trip was being with my little peanut, Sparky.

This little sparkplug likes being clean but prefers other activities to bathing:

Note her specialty "lazy hang over the tub" and the shampoo drizzle down her forehead:

And here she planned her Great Escape:

Mission accomplished and !oh! there's the inevitable shake!

And the sparkling clean face!

And finally, enjoying her Freedom Run!

After a day of bathing, playing and posing, Sparky is a tired little lady: